Many of us
grew up in a world of doing as you have been told. I can still hear my mother telling me - “Because I said so!” when I questioned
her direction. We are taught to do
things that are considered part of the norm.
Well the norm has changed a lot since I was a child as it has for most
of us. Now as an adult we begin to question what the
right direction is but often fall into the trap of the “norm”. It may be driven by what is expected of us
from family, friends and co-workers. It
may also be from the pressure we have from our social environment. No
matter what the cause we need to question why we do the things we do if we
expect to have certain results.
I believe
many of us want something different in our life but just can’t seem to find the
right direction. What is stopping
us? For some of us it’s fear. We are afraid of failing and the embarrassment
of others knowing that we failed. Or it
could be we are waiting on approval. We
need others to buy into our passion or dreams in order to start our
journey.
If you are
on the path to make some changes in your life then I would tell you to begin
with your own beliefs about your impending journey. Do you believe this is the right direction
for you to go? Your beliefs and
priorities are great motivators for moving into a new direction. But these beliefs and priorities must
outweigh the fear you have and it must not be dependent on the approval of
others. You will not make necessary
change or do things differently until the need is greater than the consequences.
Begin by embracing
the fact that it is not a perfect world.
You will have mistakes, issues and probably some failure. That is fine.
Plan for what you can up front and look to the future with an open mind.
Know that the only way to learn and move forward is by taking steps that sometimes
will be missteps.
Here is an
example. Many years ago I was a heavy
smoker. It was a terribly habit that
started when I was very young. Over the
years the habit had become expensive and was making me sick. Even so I did not want to quit. I was hooked and afraid of the pain I’d feel from
the cravings if I stopped. Then one day
I went on a trip to a completely different environment. I was around people that did not smoke or
want to be around it. The effort to
figure out how and when I could smoke a cigarette was stressful to say the
least. I begin to realize how smoking
was leading me on a road to an unhealthy and poor existence. The experience opened a new world for me and I
started on a fresh journey.
This
catalyst began a change that lead from one good experience to another. It was not easy to quit. I had
to break habits that had been a part of my life for many years. But the overall fact is that I wanted to quit. I wanted to feel better. The pain of smoking was greater than not
smoking. Quitting became a priority and
I found ways to do things differently based on need and what I wanted going
forward in my life.
Don’t lose
sight of what you want to do differently in your life. It really comes down to what you believe, want
and need. Focus on what you want in the
future and not what you are leaving in the past. Trust yourself to set your path to do things
a little different.
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